I don't even know where to start, its been so long since I have blogged and so much has happened. We had our holidays and they went smoothly for the most part. It was so nice having everyone here Christmas morning. Well except Megan, she has once again stopped contact with us, not sure why, but just something she does. It is hurtful to me, because I do think of her like my daughter, and then she goes and cuts me out for no reason (that I know of) it's hard to know what to do when it comes to her. She has such a beautiful soul, if only she would realize that and realize that we deeply love her. Sweet little M & M, we love you and miss you!
Shannon~ where to start with her, she has been through an emotional roller coaster these past 3 months, trying so hard to find herself and where she fits in. We can see God working in her life, if only she would learn to trust in Him and in herself. She has come so far in the few months she has been here, and she has given us such a reason to value life and has shown us how important good communication is and that every day is a gift and should never be taken for granted.
Fawn and Emily are on their way to being adopted! We have started the homestudy and the paper work, Fawn's dad has voluntarily given up his rights. By summer the girls will be Luthers! Fawn is doing so well at school, she is doing so well in her classes, and has friends and is enjoying it! She still has periods of time where she goes back to her old defenses, but they are coming less and less frequently.
My three bio kids are doing great. Cayden loves his new school and is doing great in it too! So proud to see him come out of his comfort zone and participate in games, and he even played a part in the play Stone soup! He is such a tender hearted little boy! Bryson is more sensitve than i would have ever thought he would be. He has turned into a shy child who won't talk to people. I don't know if i should force him to talk or just hope this is a phase and let it pass. He is worse than C was at this age. He will start school next fall, maybe that will help some. This is where I wish kids came with a manual. Baby Faith is a toddler in her terrible two's LOL! A sweet little girl who is so dramatic over everything. So much fun watching her and Emme become best friends and get into trouble together!
Ahhhhh that is the kids summed up.... Now onto life..... I have grown in many ways over the past few weeks. I have realized that life is so short, and really what matters most is our hearts and our eternal soul. Looking around there are so many hurt and lost souls. People you thought had it all together can be some of the most hurt and troubled people. We need to look past the exterior and see inside a person. We need to share with them the love of our Lord, we might not be able to make their life easy or take away some of the heartache that we all experience here but we can share with them how Christ has died for us, and their next world will be free or pain and heartache. That's what is important in my life. I want to help people see that which is most important.
I look at my daily life, constantly there is a babycrying, kids are fighting, laundry needs done, kitchen needs cleaned toys and clothes are everywhere. It's a challenge every day not to go insane and flip out, I would love for every toy to be in the right spot, all the books to be aligned on the shelf, every article of clothing to be folded in a drawer, and all food crumbs and spills to be gone....LOL, that isn't going to happen anytime soon. I have learned to be content in ALL things, whether in plenty or in want, and in 20 years, the toys will be gone, it will be silent here, i won't be tripping over toys, and slaving over piles of laundry and dishes. I know I will miss these days, it's just about finding the balance in life and keeping my sanity as i go through each day.
Many of my close friends know of the challenges we have been facing, and how much life has thrown at us. I am thankful for all of you who have been there for us it means so much to me. I have always had a hard time opening up to people and feeling comfortable reaching out, so thank you all so very much, I treasure each and every one of you more than you will ever realize you are each such a blessing to me!
Lord I thank you for these blessings you have given me and ask that you continue to give me your strength, comfort and peace as I struggle each day to be the mom and wife that i need to be. I pray that all I do be glorifying to you.
