Spring is here! What a beautiful time of the year, everything is fresh and new! The perfect time for a transformation of the heart and a renewing of your mind! This past winter was full of challenges for our family. We had many obstacles to overcome, which at the time seemed like HUGE mountains and almost impossible to face. However with every one I could feel my heavenly father calling me and begging me to trust Him and to lean on Him. I have realized many things about myself, things I didn't necessarily want to face, but so glad He forced me to see.
I look around and I wonder why we are here on earth, we are born, we grow up, we marry, we have kids, they grow up, they have kids, we die....(maybe not in that order, and not everyone marries or has kids, but you get what i am saying) just a boring cycle and really what is it's purpose? I get up every morning to babies fussing, do the same routine, get kids ready for school, unload dishwasher, load dishwasher, get breakfast, run sweeper, change diapers, feed kids, do laundry, clean up after kids, feed kids, change diapers, get kids ready for bed, clean house, go to bed and do it all over again. I would sit and be discouraged because I have no ME time, I would like to sleep till 8, get uphave a quick breakfast, go to the gym, come home shower, clean up the house eat lunch, watch a little daytime t.v. get dinner ready for my husband, sit down have a HOT meal and enjoy an uninterrupted conversation with him. I mean I know I have chosen this life, but at times i wonder sheesh, can't i just have a break? I am 30lbs over the weight I would like to be, I can't find the time to get to the gym and work out, I try to eat good, but then I find myself finishing my kids' meals so as not to waste food, then stress hits and yep I am an emotional eater, chocolate and little debbie snack cakes, love them when i am stressed....oh yeah and with 7 kids, I am pretty much stressed every day....LOL!!
That's when God spoke to me....He asked me why I thought I should be able to have an relaxing and easy life. He made me realize, I was not put on this earth for it to be simple and easy. I was put on this earth to do all the things He asks of me, and no it won't be easy. He has called me to be a wife and a mom. And every diaper I change and every child I hold crying at 200 am, the struggles that each one brings, I am to handle in a way that is gloryfying Him! Each of these moments that I am frustrated or overwhelmed are the teachable moments to show people of God's grace and love. Of course I fail many times at this, but the times I succeed are the moments I treasure. We are on this earth for such a short amount of time, we need to reach those who don't know God, and every word or every action we do, can show people Christ's love. This is one of the area's of my life, I am trying so hard to work on, somtimes i fail miserably, actually alot of the time, but I am going to keep working on! He has shown me that if I just focus on Him and keep Him as my goal, He will be with me. He will help me through lifes trials, and He will rejoice with me when things are good! Let me tell you how awesome it feels to have the King of all creation in my corner! I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me!
I look forward to this season and the next and pray for a willing spirit to follow His will and the ability to glorify Him in all I do! So, I accept that I am going to be tired everyday, I am embracing my extra 30 lbs, and giving it all to Him, and when His time right, I will be able to focus these things!
And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God. ROMANS 12:2
Saturday, April 21, 2012
Saturday, February 18, 2012
Life's Priorities
I don't even know where to start, its been so long since I have blogged and so much has happened. We had our holidays and they went smoothly for the most part. It was so nice having everyone here Christmas morning. Well except Megan, she has once again stopped contact with us, not sure why, but just something she does. It is hurtful to me, because I do think of her like my daughter, and then she goes and cuts me out for no reason (that I know of) it's hard to know what to do when it comes to her. She has such a beautiful soul, if only she would realize that and realize that we deeply love her. Sweet little M & M, we love you and miss you!
Shannon~ where to start with her, she has been through an emotional roller coaster these past 3 months, trying so hard to find herself and where she fits in. We can see God working in her life, if only she would learn to trust in Him and in herself. She has come so far in the few months she has been here, and she has given us such a reason to value life and has shown us how important good communication is and that every day is a gift and should never be taken for granted.
Fawn and Emily are on their way to being adopted! We have started the homestudy and the paper work, Fawn's dad has voluntarily given up his rights. By summer the girls will be Luthers! Fawn is doing so well at school, she is doing so well in her classes, and has friends and is enjoying it! She still has periods of time where she goes back to her old defenses, but they are coming less and less frequently.
My three bio kids are doing great. Cayden loves his new school and is doing great in it too! So proud to see him come out of his comfort zone and participate in games, and he even played a part in the play Stone soup! He is such a tender hearted little boy! Bryson is more sensitve than i would have ever thought he would be. He has turned into a shy child who won't talk to people. I don't know if i should force him to talk or just hope this is a phase and let it pass. He is worse than C was at this age. He will start school next fall, maybe that will help some. This is where I wish kids came with a manual. Baby Faith is a toddler in her terrible two's LOL! A sweet little girl who is so dramatic over everything. So much fun watching her and Emme become best friends and get into trouble together!
Ahhhhh that is the kids summed up.... Now onto life..... I have grown in many ways over the past few weeks. I have realized that life is so short, and really what matters most is our hearts and our eternal soul. Looking around there are so many hurt and lost souls. People you thought had it all together can be some of the most hurt and troubled people. We need to look past the exterior and see inside a person. We need to share with them the love of our Lord, we might not be able to make their life easy or take away some of the heartache that we all experience here but we can share with them how Christ has died for us, and their next world will be free or pain and heartache. That's what is important in my life. I want to help people see that which is most important.
I look at my daily life, constantly there is a babycrying, kids are fighting, laundry needs done, kitchen needs cleaned toys and clothes are everywhere. It's a challenge every day not to go insane and flip out, I would love for every toy to be in the right spot, all the books to be aligned on the shelf, every article of clothing to be folded in a drawer, and all food crumbs and spills to be gone....LOL, that isn't going to happen anytime soon. I have learned to be content in ALL things, whether in plenty or in want, and in 20 years, the toys will be gone, it will be silent here, i won't be tripping over toys, and slaving over piles of laundry and dishes. I know I will miss these days, it's just about finding the balance in life and keeping my sanity as i go through each day.
Many of my close friends know of the challenges we have been facing, and how much life has thrown at us. I am thankful for all of you who have been there for us it means so much to me. I have always had a hard time opening up to people and feeling comfortable reaching out, so thank you all so very much, I treasure each and every one of you more than you will ever realize you are each such a blessing to me!
Lord I thank you for these blessings you have given me and ask that you continue to give me your strength, comfort and peace as I struggle each day to be the mom and wife that i need to be. I pray that all I do be glorifying to you.
Shannon~ where to start with her, she has been through an emotional roller coaster these past 3 months, trying so hard to find herself and where she fits in. We can see God working in her life, if only she would learn to trust in Him and in herself. She has come so far in the few months she has been here, and she has given us such a reason to value life and has shown us how important good communication is and that every day is a gift and should never be taken for granted.
Fawn and Emily are on their way to being adopted! We have started the homestudy and the paper work, Fawn's dad has voluntarily given up his rights. By summer the girls will be Luthers! Fawn is doing so well at school, she is doing so well in her classes, and has friends and is enjoying it! She still has periods of time where she goes back to her old defenses, but they are coming less and less frequently.
My three bio kids are doing great. Cayden loves his new school and is doing great in it too! So proud to see him come out of his comfort zone and participate in games, and he even played a part in the play Stone soup! He is such a tender hearted little boy! Bryson is more sensitve than i would have ever thought he would be. He has turned into a shy child who won't talk to people. I don't know if i should force him to talk or just hope this is a phase and let it pass. He is worse than C was at this age. He will start school next fall, maybe that will help some. This is where I wish kids came with a manual. Baby Faith is a toddler in her terrible two's LOL! A sweet little girl who is so dramatic over everything. So much fun watching her and Emme become best friends and get into trouble together!
Ahhhhh that is the kids summed up.... Now onto life..... I have grown in many ways over the past few weeks. I have realized that life is so short, and really what matters most is our hearts and our eternal soul. Looking around there are so many hurt and lost souls. People you thought had it all together can be some of the most hurt and troubled people. We need to look past the exterior and see inside a person. We need to share with them the love of our Lord, we might not be able to make their life easy or take away some of the heartache that we all experience here but we can share with them how Christ has died for us, and their next world will be free or pain and heartache. That's what is important in my life. I want to help people see that which is most important.
I look at my daily life, constantly there is a babycrying, kids are fighting, laundry needs done, kitchen needs cleaned toys and clothes are everywhere. It's a challenge every day not to go insane and flip out, I would love for every toy to be in the right spot, all the books to be aligned on the shelf, every article of clothing to be folded in a drawer, and all food crumbs and spills to be gone....LOL, that isn't going to happen anytime soon. I have learned to be content in ALL things, whether in plenty or in want, and in 20 years, the toys will be gone, it will be silent here, i won't be tripping over toys, and slaving over piles of laundry and dishes. I know I will miss these days, it's just about finding the balance in life and keeping my sanity as i go through each day.
Many of my close friends know of the challenges we have been facing, and how much life has thrown at us. I am thankful for all of you who have been there for us it means so much to me. I have always had a hard time opening up to people and feeling comfortable reaching out, so thank you all so very much, I treasure each and every one of you more than you will ever realize you are each such a blessing to me!
Lord I thank you for these blessings you have given me and ask that you continue to give me your strength, comfort and peace as I struggle each day to be the mom and wife that i need to be. I pray that all I do be glorifying to you.
Monday, October 24, 2011
My Favorite Season!
Fall is here! YOOHOO!!! I had a fantastic weekend! Yesterday I made a walnut chocolate pie(which was only eh...) potato soup and then we had a bonfire with fireworks! Oh how I love the chilliness in the air and the warmth of the house. We got a new sectional couch on friday, so comfy to sit on and the best part is we can all sit together!
So I have been homeschooling the kiddos and for the past couple weeks it has been getting the best of me. I have really been struggling with finding a balance to schooling, housework, babies etc... Fawn has not been turning in assignments, so she is failing 3 out of the 4 classes. So I am having to work and watch her more than I had anticipated lately. I really want the kids to have a good education, I don't want to ruin their education in any way, that is my biggest fear. The babies are dropping naps, which means the time of doing school while they sleeping is out the door..... so, Shannon said she would watch the babies while I do school for 2 hours every am. So far it is working out awesome! She is such a huge help in so many ways! If I can get this part of my life under control in the next few weeks, I will feel soooo much better!
Starting the bible study, Breaking Free on friday, looking forward to it! Hoping to cut the last ties that my past has on me. I just want to have complete peace in all aspects of my life. Having freedom from the strongholds will be such a huge step in becoming the woman God wants me to be. I am still praying for that calm gentle spirit to come my way, so if you would pray for me I would appreciate it! Well the munchkins should all start waking up soon, off to start the day! Praising God for the beauty he has given us!
So I have been homeschooling the kiddos and for the past couple weeks it has been getting the best of me. I have really been struggling with finding a balance to schooling, housework, babies etc... Fawn has not been turning in assignments, so she is failing 3 out of the 4 classes. So I am having to work and watch her more than I had anticipated lately. I really want the kids to have a good education, I don't want to ruin their education in any way, that is my biggest fear. The babies are dropping naps, which means the time of doing school while they sleeping is out the door..... so, Shannon said she would watch the babies while I do school for 2 hours every am. So far it is working out awesome! She is such a huge help in so many ways! If I can get this part of my life under control in the next few weeks, I will feel soooo much better!
Starting the bible study, Breaking Free on friday, looking forward to it! Hoping to cut the last ties that my past has on me. I just want to have complete peace in all aspects of my life. Having freedom from the strongholds will be such a huge step in becoming the woman God wants me to be. I am still praying for that calm gentle spirit to come my way, so if you would pray for me I would appreciate it! Well the munchkins should all start waking up soon, off to start the day! Praising God for the beauty he has given us!
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